Karma; my son is turning into me.

IMG_6127From the minute Jack was born, it was pretty obvious that he was mine. The poor kid. He looks exactly like me. We came out of the womb looking exactly the same, and from here on out he’s getting more and more like me.

The problem? He also has my personality. Which makes him stubborn. And always right. At the moment he’s approaching 4, so we’re needing to discipline him from time to time. 99% of the time he is a great child. 99% of the time he is a polite and loving child, and he and his sister have a beautiful relationship going on. We understand how lucky we are.

It’s the 1% of time when he decides he’s the boss that we seriously clash. Inevitably, I get to the end of an argument with him and realise that I can’t be mad at him, because he’s doing exactly the same thing I would have done. Deep down I’m trying not to laugh as the reality sets in. A good 20 more years of this. 20 more years of facing off against a nemesis from my own DNA. Like Darth Vader staring down Luke, waiting to see who blinks.

17264717_10155034869710275_912693182271065072_nAngie of course, beautifully natured and rarely mad (only at me), can’t handle any conflict, so Jack is immediately forgiven for all wrong doing. ‘He’s just too damn cute’ she says, giving up on her anger and smothering him with cuddles. Side note – Angie maintains that Jack has her toes – she’s really clutching at straws here. I maintain they all have her bum chin (see right), but I digress.

Discipline is a touchy subject. It’s something that can cause arguments between parents, between couples. I was smacked as a child and I’m sure I deserved it. I still turned out fine. Angie (the yin to my yang) was of course an Angel in her youth and never in trouble. Despite the differences, we both agree and are against smacking our children. We never have. I’m thinking some big kid will put him in his place in the school yard at some point and he’ll learn to bite his tongue.

So as he grows up, I’m sure I’ll need to continually learn. He’ll continue to want his independence, he’ll continue to want to grow into his own mould. Realistically I need to learn to argue with myself. Because that’s who I’m fighting against. I can feel my parents laughing somewhere off in the distance whilst Jack and I disagree on whether he should apologise to his sister or not.


Rainy Scottish weather = childhood reminiscing.

After only just recovering from a 40hour transit with 2 young kids, I’ll be very open with my love of the iPad. I don’t think we could have survived the trip without them. iPads, battery power pods and USB chargers on flights. Honestly, how did we survive all those years ago? My first long haul flight I remember having to talk to the person next to me. Like a weirdo.

FullSizeRender-2But after a few weeks of false advertising and some actual warm weather, sure enough, the Scottish weather we all knew was coming is here. And it’s settled in for the Summer by the looks. Days and days of wind, rain and cold. Miserable weather that can only be solved by slippers and a fireplace.

But thanks to a ye olde time toy shoppe down the road, we’ve been able to solve the rainy weather blues with the kids, as well as re-living our childhood. The toy store has a stack of travel sized old school board games; Guess Who, Monopoly, Cluedo. Man if they had Battleships I’d never leave the house again.

The greatest thing, is that the iPads have gone away. The kids are loving getting around a mini board game again. ‘Colonel Mustard with the Rope in the Study’, accusations going everywhere, ‘Do you have Glasses?’, ‘No’, ‘Are you Eric?’ deductions. Outside of the inevitable argument over who gets to be the Dog on Monopoly, everyone is happy again.

We even ventured out the other day during a small break in the weather to a Ten Pin Bowling place of all places. I didn’t even know they still existed – and one’s just down the road from us. Granted, this place probably hasn’t had a hygiene check or technological upgrade since I was 7, but therein lay the charm. Watching Jack’s delight as he pushes ball after ball down the gutter (never mind we’re paying $2 per bowl or something) made up for any weather concerns.

At night time, Oce is in bed reading Enid Blyton to Jack under the covers, the muffled stories of meddling kids solving mysteries coming through to our bedroom. Angie and I drift slowly off while the kids stay up by the lamps glow lost in the adventures. Tangent – surely someone noticed these kids missing for days on end? Imagine if she wrote those books now – talk about irresponsible parents. Then again, those Dursley’s hardly cared too much about Harry’s whereabouts and no outspoken parents groups seemed to care. But I digress.

It’s been a wet week, a cold week, a miserable week. But it’s not like we came to Scotland to get a sun tan. If I wanted to hang around British people and get a suntan, I’d go to Ibiza. The important thing is that the kids have been happy. And the fact that Angie and I could do that whilst re-living our own childhood has been even better.

To your health.


35 today, celebrating and reminiscing.

Today is my birthday. 35 years old today. A nice round number, but nothing to really celebrate. The memories behind my birthday today was the full circle life seemed to have taken. Exactly half my life ago, I took my first ever international flight, over to Scotland for a year travelling. 17.5 years later, I sat in a cafe with my family, enjoying a relaxed birthday lunch with the kids, watching my son literally demolish the food in front of him – enjoying the entertainment of creating a mess over the taste and satiety.

So many lessons were learned in this trip 17 years ago, and it’s been so much fun taking the kids around the beautiful country that is Scotland, reminiscing the old for me, and seeing the new excitement in their eyes.


They say everyone has a book in them, perhaps this is the beginning of my first book. I say first book, because I have so many ideas flying around my head, I’m sure I could write a few, they’d just be short at the moment. Needing the time to pad them out into something that someone would actually want to read. Hopefully this can serve as a warm up to a new skill I never thought I would develop. In fact at school if I managed a pass in English class I was proud. A conceded pass was normally my modus operandi, with teachers turning a blind eye to my poor English skills on the back of my Maths and Science scores dragging me over the line.

So today I sat in that little cafe in a back street of Edinburgh, a handful of people walking past braced against the frigid winds of a country only a few sleeps away from ‘Summer’. I thought of the decisions that I made 17 years ago, the decisions I’ve made since, and how everything has ended up to bring us all to this point.

So many people are scared to make that big leap, scared to do something crazy in case they leave the pathway and never come back. But, as Henry David Thoreau says, ‘the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation’. Desperate to do something different but suffering in silence. The decisions that have allowed us to get here haven’t been easy at times, have been met with plenty of judgement and ridicule. But if we can inspire others to take the leap of faith and end up in a happy place at the end of it, then we’ve left the world in a better place.

The truth of course is that it’s never one major leap, it’s never 1 critical decision that changes everything. It’s the accumulation of small everyday decisions that seem so meaningless at the time, even irrelevant. But really, it’s a matter of building a different mindset in, that allows you to review those decisions from a different perspective and take a slightly different path. The results won’t appear overnight, but give it a month, a year, a decade – and people will be asking you how you did it.

There is a great book by Jeff Olsen called The Slight Edge, where he discusses these exact concepts. The slightly better decision every day. Having a handful of nuts rather than a snickers bar. Doing it once won’t really change your body – either way. Skipping the gym one morning won’t do any damage, nor will spending an extra 5 minutes there one day make any discernible gains. But multiply these small decisions over a year and imagine where you’ll be. The person who skipped the gym every morning, vs the person who got there every morning. The person who had a handful of nuts for afternoon tea vs the person who had a chocolate bar. The problem is, we never take into account the accumulation of our decisions. We tend to look at them as isolated incidents. Successful people develop the mindset that every decision matters, and they know that success takes time to develop. The growth curve at the start is slow to get off the ground, then at the end it’s exponentially fast.

Taking a leap is a great expression, but huge decisions are rarely followed through with the same gusto they were made. But turning small decisions into successful habits will take you places, take you amazing places; just might take a little bit of time. But one day, someone will tell you you’re lucky, and that’s when you know your hard work and discipline has paid off.